I wonder if I've gotten better in the past few months. I think there are a few people who would actually be able to tell me the Truth. Sort of "time capsule" people. Am I somehow more like myself than I once was? I know myself better. I know what I want. I don't know if I am what I want to be. Or if I'm on the track to get there. Or if there can be a track. Do you ever call someone the wrong name? Do you ever really want to call someone the wrong name? What does that say about your relationship with that person? Or what does it say about your relationship with the person who's name you actually used? I cherish old times. The romance of my life was stronger then, everything fit in place. There will come a day when I cherish these times. It will be when I cannot get them back, and after I have lamented this fact. Until then I'll be calm, and pretend to be angry, pretend to be frustrated and grind my teeth. My hair will get long and my teeth will get long and the minutes and seconds I use to measure my life will get long.